“Burning each other to ashes is not a “twin flame” XD
In my humble opinion, for each individual, real flames come from holistic fulfillment.”
– paraphrase what I recently tweeted (tw’d?).
Note: We have no affiliation with that spiritual poetess lady, just linking what I took as an input to generate my response. Call it academic legacy, citing and referencing everything for your edification/future research possibilities.
The passion that comes from compatibility of some aspects of two living human beings can blossom into romance, and move from general love into personal love, and create an ongoing cycle of positive synergy.
However, that synergy can turn negative, and become focused on pain compensation rather than pain expulsion, for many reasons which are mostly incidental.
What do I mean by all of those big words?
Well, read the tweet: “burning each other to ashes” is something which happens if one person acts from their “pain body” or “resident Parasite” rather than their aspiration to enjoy everything that life happens to offer.
However, the other person can become warped by this, if they cannot let go of the other person’s garbage (which is all a pain body or Parasite are), and instead become somewhat obsessed with attempting to “fix” the situation by helping the other person, rather than helping themselves.
Self-care is never selfish for its own sake, but it is also not limited to direct, incarnate care.
All of the self-help books, videos, yoga classes, massage classes, are available to us due to business systems which arose based on them. They most sustainable ones are build like quiet empires; quiet because they don’t raise a flag or say “look at me, I am an empire”. They may not even retain much wealth in the medium term.
However, they all follow certain business principles, even if those who followed them were not conscious aware of it at the time. They all say “no” to a lot of business deals which would be bad to them, and have the fortune to say “yes” to a lot of opportunities which are not available to most of humanity.
Yet, it works out okay, provided that the systems do provide benefits to those who can afford them. Codifying information in books, and donating books to libraries (or encouraging others to do so) is one way to make sure that information is closer to the “personal sea” of every individual, and the development of systems such as Chi Nei Tsang and Flowing Zen Qigong follow this tradition.
Building a company (not necessarily a global empire) is something which all humans attempt to do, even if they have no conscious awareness of doing so. We call it, “building an ego”, or “having a strong personality”. It is a positive thing, but in order to develop fully, we need to remember that the socially bound roles which we take are only roles. They are not the essence of who we are.
Who we are, ideally, is defined in absolute positive terms; with negatives being due to various impositions of society and circumstances. Pain is meant to be temporary, not defining.
However, physical and emotional pains can become long-lasting. They can overwhelm the nervous system of the physical body, and the compensations systems of the emotional body. They can both inhibit the ability of humans to act intelligently.
Self-care, therefore, also has a professional component to it. This professional component, however, is limited by direct circumstances. No matter how much I might want to, I couldn’t create something for the German market right now, as I do not speak German. In the same way, most people don’t speak high finance. They cannot generate a business proposal, because they do not speak the language.
Of course, if I decide that Germany is where I want to go, then I can gather information about how to get to Germany… and keep pushing until I find a way. Perhaps by teaching English there, for example… however, if time is of the essence, then the language and location have become barriers, rather than steps on the path of ascendancy.
Getting back to companies… my personal interest is not centered on healing and such. I have had to learn a lot about it due to circumstances and impositions, but even if I were to do anything commercially in that space, it is not my primary aspiration. Furthermore, I don’t think that your work and hobbies need to be coherent, nor that your life should be devoted primarily to only one thing.
Whether it be their last careers, raising a family, or playing poker, all of the authors of well-written books have focused on something besides that singular focus; however for the sake of preservation, most of my past articles will be worked into booklets and distributed as e-books, and then as collections, when they are numerous enough. This is still, however, just a hobby. I don’t discuss my business plans in advance with the general public; plans change but public statements are set in wet sand.
Furthermore, I don’t have many of the opportunities which others have… but I have some which they don’t, and it is up to me to capitalize on them, and not worry so much about the world.
Unless, of course, you’d like to vote me as your new leader.
Vote, that is, with your money and primary devotion.
The former is already done by the global banking system, which we cannot opt out of, and the latter, would be something personal to every individual, but, pliable.
[ By this, I was making an obscure joke, which didn’t translate well: we all are essentially within a one-wold monetary system, and by being forced to focus on monetary value, we miss out on a lot. ]
The coherent soul bounces, but the pain body attempts to usurp the self-image, amplifying its existence into an obsession which becomes a disability; this is compounded by restrictions against spiritual emergence in the form of assumptions about finance which are common but fiscally fatal.
The latter, well, I am weary of human attempts to help other humans, without first gaining clear perception. This is not the ideal medium to illustrate complexity.
Currently, only a rare few can gain both fiscal and personal self-actualization, but they are opportunities which can be transformed into profit zones, for everyone, everywhere. The sadness is that we often have to compromise, at best, or worse, cause harm beyond our independent intentions, in order to achieve it.
Sometimes the person you help today will be, not the person to help you tomorrow, but the person who lets you realize you have hands and strength beyond your assumed self image.
Still, don’t suffer. Seek until you find the help that is an Advocate on your behalf, and build both personally (through virtues) and professionally (through deals).
My point is to avoid the “Hollywood trap” of thinking that love is limited to romantic love, needs to be sacrificial and is based on compliance or domination games. Love is meant to flow, unhindered as much as possible. Those who give only in order to act out their “pain body” are seeking love from outside, which they need to get from within;
In the current financial system, some people can make a living at art, and such; but even if I personally go on to do so, I know that most people cannot do this, and most people, regardless of their apparent life choices, are doing only what they see as options, and do not have the leeway to live a life where their passion for being kind is also deeply integrated into their need to make money, esp. if they want this money in a reliable and timely matter.
So, don’t also fall into the trap of thinking that the professional development that I speak of is easy. For most people, it is much, much harder than the personal development side. (Both are somewhat easy for me, but that is due to circumstances and skills which I inherited in one way or another, even those I developed are not due to effort alone, thus I humbly suggest they are rare and we shouldn’t look down at those who lack them).
Due to the simple assumption that professional development is enough, however, the world becomes complicated, and conflicts start based on a lack of agreement about the place of money, and the ways to build.
This is not what I am talking about…. my point is, people can burn you out by avoiding their own development, and dump that on you.
Don’t fall for that shit.
Fear (and the related anxieties), insecurity (or hope in loss), doubt (or faith in destruction), should be minor, occasional blips, and not the driving factors behind any type of entanglement. Detachment is necessary for compassion, and compassion is necessary for both self-care and pure love.
Love is an emotion meant to rise you up, but the joys of romance are tempered by the reality of the complex world that humans have always lived within. If you are not careful, kindness will be a vector for mutual trashing, and an abusive relationship will form, destroying the key emanations of “fire”: joy, mutual respect, and love.
This is a first draft. Sat. 3rd Sep. 2016, second shift.